Short Work Week

If it's a short work week, like everyone's saying, why don't we just have short people work it?

Makes sense.

Airline Online

I wish when you reserve an airline seat online, the map would tell you about the people around you--that guy's a jerk, this one's mellow. A talker. Kinda nosey. Whoa, BO to the left.

Stuff like that would help a LOT.

Snort

So say you're laughing hard and you snort mid-laugh. How do you recover?

Not that I've done that, but I have a friend...

TMI?

So if I say it's really hot, and a friend says, "Yeah, I'm sweatin' in six places," is that TMI?

Curls

Sometimes I like to tame my curls.
Sometimes I let them go wild.
That's how I roll.
That's how they roll.

Seat Belts

Seat belts can help even in the rain, my friend.

Dumb Free Offer

Dumbest offer I've seen so far today:
Buy any 2 sets of guitar strings or 1 set of bass strings between May 1, 2009 and July 31, 2009 and get a FREE Elixir® Strings t-shirt! WOW.

You GOTTA Be KIDDIN' ME! A FREE t-shirt that says Elixir strings! CRAZY WILD Stuff!

Hey, how 'bout a free guitar?! Huh?

Punching Hot

Somtimes when I'm in a hot, crowded room and am sweating down both sides of my forehead and someone comes up to me and says, "Hey, you're sweating," I wanna say, "Uh, yeah, I KNOW that, Forrest." And then I wanna punch him.

Is that wrong?