So I was in Liverpool this week for a Paul McCartney thing with my old college buddy and he bumps into some Japanese visitors at a gift shop and introduces them to me. Because I speak the language, all of sudden, these guys think I’m their best friend. And they’re very polite and accommodating (how could you not like friendly Japanese people?). But they want to tag along with us, and we didn’t really want that obligation, so we part ways for the day. Later that night, we see them in another part of Liverpool by the Cavern, where the Beatles played 292 times. And our Japanese friends think it must be fate that we meet again, so they want to get pictures with us (like we’re some stars but we’re, you know, NOT).
I’m really not very interested in taking pictures with them because 1. I just met them a few hours earlier, and 2. (and this is the important part) I’m NEVER gonna see them again. Still, we oblige (to soothe international relations) BUT when I stand with the first Japanese guy and I put my elbow on his shoulder like we’re best buds, he puts his arm around me, but because of the height difference (6 foot 5 to his whatever), his hand goes right on my butt, my tush, my right cheek! YIKES. And he leaves it there as he smiles big for the camera (again, like we’re lifelong friends). AWKWARD.
What do you DO in times like that? Slouch? Roll out aWAY from the hand? Fake a coughing fit? I was blank AND shocked. But I made it through (scarred but breathing). Just then, the second Japanese friend comes out of the store and wants a picture with me, so now I’m standing between these two “best friends I ever had from Japan” and the first guy does it again – same cheek! My picture taking brother is laughing so hard, he can’t keep the camera still, which ONLY prolongs the ordeal. Take it. Take it. TAKE IT.
If you know how to break out of those situations, please, do tell. I have a gift from Liverpool for the best answer. (No, not the Japanese man unless, you know.)
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11 comments:
HA HA HA!!!! Oh my gosh! I love it. That is so hilarious. Man, lucky YOU! Definitely tops anything else that happened in England. Sorry Paul.
Tim: Your dare of the week should be - to grab their hands and politely place them on the small of your back! Hello...what any normal person would do! Don't just stand there....wow...Trains, Planes and Automobiles flashback!
You could just start shimming up and down, you know, like a pee shiver, then say "Burr it just got really cold." Then if you have to finish the picture, tuck the tush under and slouch down.
Oh my heck, that's so funny! Who knew?? AWKWARD!!
Good ideas! Except the grabbing his hand part. I'm going BACK to Liverpool to test it out.
Hey, haven't I taught you better? Dah, what would you tell your daughters? "Don't just stand there, move his darn hand!" Funny story!
Easy. Simply excuse yourself from the photo and pretend to fix or adjust something on the camera. While tinkering around with it, engage your brother or the photographer in a comment, then turn to your new friends and explain in Japanes that it's your photographer who wants to be in the photo but he's too shy to ask. Encourage your new friends to help him feel welcome by pulling him into or "grabbing" him for the pose. Take the camera, line everyone up and snap away. It should be great fun.
Why do I get the impression you weren't THAT uncomfortable?? j/k
most girls will tell you, just move the guys hand for pete's sake.
This story almost beats aimee's story of getting licked by a guy in London who said he was John Lennon's brother. True story.
http://trixystravels.blogspot.com/
While I've gotten some great suggestions on what to do IF this ever happens again, I must say, Shep's Blog is the winner of the gift from Liverpool. Shep gave me options, a nice strategy and even some social direction. He bravely said it will be easy--always a plus for the shocked & stunned during an international photo opp. So I gladly award Shep a gift from the city of the four lads who, as they say, "changed the world."
I say you reach down and grab a handfull of Japanese hiney flesh yourself... (for the sake of foreign relations). Grip and grin.
Levi E, you're a close second AND funny AND something tells me this isn't your first international encounter.
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