Whiskers

I've never really had whiskers before. But now I have 'em. I'm older than most people I know, so why now? Why whiskers at this age? They're an odd sensation. I mean, I have to shave like EVERY day (almost) and it's kinda buggy. EVERY DAY?? I've been going DECADES without worrying about shaving except maybe twice a week but now...

And like when I blow my nose and wipe with a Kleenex, invariably some tissue stays IN the whiskers. Why isn't this happening to OTHERS? I don't see anyone ELSE walking around with Kleenex particles dangling. Is this something I have to MASTER? Will it take months, years?

I used to do this joke on people at parties where I'd motion to them that they have something on the side of their mouth. And, horrified, they'd quickly brush it away. But nothing was one their face. I'd even have friends watch as I did it to person after person. Same reactions. Then we'd all laugh. I'm not laughing now. People are doing this to me and mostly because I think I have DT (dangling tissue). It's not funny. All those years, I was the Jokester, now I'm the JokestEE.

You know, since I actually STARTED the Fake Food on Face joke, I think I can be the one to stop it. You can stop and start your OWN jokes. That one was mine. Deal?